Okay! So, when I first saw this Bhumi – Akshay starer movie “Toilet-Ek Prem Katha”, I knew that it was based on some real life incident of a village. The purpose of writing this article is not to share any movie review but to share a similar situation from my life.
So, My marriage was fixed with a guy who resided in Delhi. He has his roots from a village of Uttar Pradesh where his grand father, grand mother and Uncle’s family were living in their paternal home. When our marriage date was fixed, my family was informed that all the marriage rituals from Groom’s side will took place in their village and after Vidai, I will also live in the village for around a week to attend after-marriage functions. I was fine with living in village because my belonging is also from a rural area so nothing unusual for me. Of course, there was a fear inside because after-all that was going to be my Sasural and I will be a new bride but I started preparing myself to remain calm and go on with whatsoever comes.
There is huge difference in lifestyle and mindset of urban and rural people which definitely sometimes creates a situation that can be uncomfortable and unacceptable for you. I was preparing myself to be perfect, ideal and presentable in front of everybody who will visit me in village. I did not wanted to commit any mistake which can ruin the reputation of this brand new Badi Bahu.
As explained by my fiance in our courtship period, the washroom and toilet of the house in village were at a distance, outside the house. One has to cross an open area from the main door of house to reach the washroom. There was a hand-pump nearby from where one has to carry water to the toilet. While listening to my fiance, I was only imagining the situation and preparing myself to manage with this long distance washroom thing. One day after our usual talks, he told me that he has asked his family to built a washroom and a toilet inside the house. They had a pretty big home with a good empty space where he suggested to have a washroom. According to his family, it was a waste of money specially at the time of marriage. My would be in-laws tried to convince my fiance that all the ladies of the family use the same washroom that is outside the house and it will not be an issue for the new bride. They made sure that someone will always accompany me to reach the washroom so that I am not uncomfortable. But, my fiance was not convinced at all. He transferred money immediately and asked everyone to understand his request.
5 days were left from our wedding date when my fiance took leave from office and reached his village. To his surprise, the washroom and toilet were not completed and nobody was bothered to get it done on time. He busted into anger and took the charge himself. He went strict with the workers to get it done within the timeline. None of the family members interrupted again because he has cleared that if the toilet is completed in 5 days, he will not take me to the village after marriage. So, finally after so much chaos and delays, the work was completed on time. After marriage ceremony, when I reached the village, I was the one who inaugurated the toilet by using it first. LOL!! There was proper water connections, water tank and taps inside the washroom so there was also no requirement to carry water from anywhere. I was relieved and overwhelmed after seeing the toilet inside the house. I fall in love with my husband for the first time. (Kidding)
Although, I was prepared for the toilet outside the house, but only I knew how much convenient it was for me to have it inside the house. Many people from village who came to know the reason behind new toilet and bathroom, called it the wastage of money. According to many ladies who visited out home, “Itna to ladies ko manage karna hi padta hai. Koi Khet me to jana nhi tha. Ghar se 100 kadam pr hi to tha purana toilet, bs bahar hi to niklna hota.“
Only I knew how much I owe my husband for his one little but brave step. Of course, I would have managed those 100 step distance each time when I have to go to toilet. But, to cover those 100 steps, each time I had to maintain my walking speed that should be not be very fast, each time I had to take care of my Saree, my ghunghat. Each time I had to cross the surveillance of the people who were outside the house. So, Yes! Only I know the difference between Convenience and Compromising, Comfort and Adjustment.
I feel proud that my husband is sensible and strong enough to take that step against all the odds. He did not asked me to adjust in that situation even though as a new bride, I had to live in the village for only a week. He made it convenient not only for a week but for the lifetime, not only for me but to every woman who is part of our family or who will become part of our family in future. When we say “Change is required in society“, we should start that change from our home. One can always ask the women in their family to adjust or compromise, And women! as per their in-built nature, will always be ready to adjust happily. But, your one step can lead the lady to know her value, her worth. This was my version of ‘Toilet – Ek Prem Katha‘.
Hope you like it. Do share your point of view through comments.
– Sristi Singh (Blogger)
(Notice: All the content shared in the blog and its articles are copyrighted by MyTeaTimeThoughts team and its guest writers. Any use of the content outside this blog without prior written permission of MyTeaTimeThoughts is strictly prohibited.)